Why use a third person service – Story 2
Communication is a major challenge in personal relationships. We all carry more or less baggage due to personal issues such as failed relationships, childhood issues, personal growth issues, or stories of other people who had bad relationship experiences, etc. When it comes to meeting a new person, trying to start an intimate relationship, those baggage stays in the way in our communication. People lose plenty opportunities of connecting with a real potential partner due to communication breakdown caused by those problems.
Apart from working on getting rid of our internal baggage, using a third person service can help break through those blockage in communication.
This story shows how a well educated intelligent person can benefit from a personalised third person service by using its potential.
Andy is a successful stock broker at his late 40s. He has divorced for many years, and had a recent relationship which ended a couple of years before he came to see me. He had no children from his previous marriage but coming from a loving family, he really wanted to have his own. He had used dating website RSVP; then personal introduction agencies ” Bluelabel Life” , ” Vital Partners” before he came to see me. The first thing he said to me as he entered my office was ” I want to meet someone who really wants to have kids “. His previous girlfriend dated him for two years before she told him she could not have children. He felt misled. He spent 2 years life building a relationship which could not fulfil his needs. He had to start again because it was essential to have a family.
As our conversation went on, I realised Jenny was the person he was looking for. She, at her late 30s, was an attractive entertainer with a divorce and no kids. She was a family person who regarded marriage as an essential form of relationship. As I was showing her photo to Andy, he was surprised as he realised that they had met each other 3 years before in a business meeting. He was very attracted to her then however would not be able to ask her out because he assumed she was married. It looks like Jenny had been waiting on my list for 2 and half years for Andy! I was confident as I knew her well and knew what kid of man she wants.
I phoned Jenny saying ” I think this time I have found someone for you “.
They clicked at first meeting. Feedback from both sides was good. Andy contacted me almost everyday keeping in touch. A few weeks went by, I received an email from him. He said, everything was going well between, and they seemed to have so much in common. However there wasn’t much intimacy involved. He had wasted 2 years from previous relationship; did not want to break up in a few months with no results. I understood his concern – he was not sure how much she liked him. But I was sure she did like him because I knew her dating habit. Jenny was very intuitive in judging her dates. She would not carry on meeting him if she was not interested. I just have to double check with her. I told Andy to wait for me. I phoned Jenny straightaway. She said to me: ” I like him a lot. I want to take it slow because I want to make it permanent! I also do not want to get hurt! He has not taken any initiative yet either…..”. My assessment was confirmed. I sent Andy a text that evening on his mobile saying ” …….She likes you a lot and she wants to make it permanent. why don’t you put your fear in the wind, go ahead and love as if you have never been hurt before? “. Andy replied: “….points taken…I will go ahead”
One week later, Andy’s email came:
………As per your suggestion, I threw caution to the wind and opened my heart to Jenny and it has worked a treat. Thank you for your wisdom. Jenny has also opened her heart to me as well. We are getting closer and closer.
Jenny’s feedback after one month:
………. We have fallen so madly in love with each other. Things are going very well. We are so well suited to each other.
Andy and Jenny married in January 2008.
In 2010 I received an email from Jenny:
……….All is great with us – we have just bought our new home together and are very happy. It is unbelievable how well suited we are together. It is so easy being in our relationship. Andy is truly one of a kind. We work so well together.